From Economist to Exaggerator: Rachel Reeves’ CV Scandal Proves She’s Better at Faking Jobs Than Fixing Britain’s Economy!

Hi and welcome to this Video Production News Friday Op-Ed

Picture the scene: the UK economy teeters on the brink, the pound is looking more fragile than a soggy Rich Tea biscuit, and inflation is running hotter than a Vindaloo on curry night. And who’s steering the ship through these stormy waters? None other than Rachel from Accounts, the self-anointed “economist” whose CV appears to have more creative flourishes than a pretentious Instagram influencer's bio.

Yes, Rachel Reeves—the woman entrusted with balancing the nation's books—has been caught red-handed embellishing her CV. It turns out that when Rachel wasn’t moonlighting as the UK's answer to Keynes, she was more likely organizing the stationery cupboard at Halifax Bank of Scotland than drafting economic models. And let’s be honest, “Retail Banking” doesn’t quite have the same ring as “Economist,” does it?

But rather than fessing up, Rachel from Accounts decided the best course of action was to quietly tweak her LinkedIn profile. Gone is the lofty title of “Economist.” Instead, it now reads “Retail Banking” at Halifax—because apparently, rebranding yourself online is the political equivalent of a Ctrl+Z for your past mistakes. If only we could edit the UK’s spiraling deficit as easily.

From Economist to Exaggerator-in-Chief

Now, let’s not be too harsh. After all, many of us have polished our CVs. Maybe you claimed to be “proficient in Excel” when you only know how to merge cells, or said you’re “fluent in Spanish” when all you can do is order sangria on holiday. But Rachel didn’t just polish her credentials; she went full Picasso.

The revelations have led to widespread ridicule. Nigel Farage quipped that Rachel “probably ordered the paper clips,” while critics across the political spectrum have dubbed her “economical with the truth.” Even the meme factories of Twitter had a field day, with one wag suggesting her next role would be “Chief Economist at Greggs,” ensuring sausage roll production stays on track.

And it’s not the first time Rachel has faced accusations of playing fast and loose with the truth. Some might recall last October, when her much-hyped book, The Women Who Made Modern Economics, landed her in hot water. The Financial Times exposed that several passages had been “borrowed” from other sources without citation. Reeves eventually admitted to “inadvertent mistakes” and issued an apology, though the damage was already done. Critics were left wondering if Rachel’s bibliography had been written in invisible ink.

What’s the Big Deal?

Here’s the thing: Rachel’s little LinkedIn lie isn’t just a PR gaffe. It’s a betrayal of public trust. This is the person tasked with managing the UK’s finances, a role that demands honesty, transparency, and, dare I say it, competence. When the Chancellor of the Exchequer starts fiddling their CV, what message does that send to the rest of us? That it’s okay to inflate the truth as long as you don’t get caught?

And it’s not like this is a one-off. Rachel has a track record of playing fast and loose with facts. Remember when she misquoted IMF figures to back her policies? Or the time she waved around a phantom £22 billion black hole in the budget, only to go strangely silent when asked for the receipts? If she’s this cavalier with her CV, imagine how she’s managing the nation’s accounts.

And on that note, I do want to wish Rachel from Accounts the best of luck with her new self-help book, How to Fake Your CV. With her track record, it’s bound to be a bestseller—assuming she doesn’t accidentally copy and paste the whole thing from Wikipedia.

A Catalogue of Economic Catastrophes

While Rachel from Accounts has been busy rewriting her career history, the real economy is heading south faster than a retiree chasing the winter sun in Marbella. Growth has stalled, inflation is still biting, and businesses are buckling under Labour’s punitive taxes. The farming community is furious, small businesses are suffocating, and families are struggling to keep the lights on.

Labour’s promises of transparency and competence have been exposed as hollow rhetoric. Instead, we’ve got a Chancellor who spends more time curating her online persona than curating policies that actually work. And let’s not forget her boss, Sir Keir Starmer, whose idea of defending Rachel is to say, “Well, she’s better than the last lot.” If that’s the benchmark, we’re all doomed.

Time to Pack Up the Paper Clips

So, what’s next for Rachel from Accounts? Should we just let her carry on, hoping she’ll one day graduate from paperclip-purchasing to actual economics? Or do we demand higher standards from the people running our country?

The answer is clear: Rachel Reeves must resign. Not because she made a mistake—everyone makes mistakes—but because she tried to cover it up. Trust in politics is already as rare as a unicorn at a petrol station, and this fiasco only deepens the public’s cynicism.

Rachel, it’s time to do the decent thing. Take your embellished CV, your edited LinkedIn, and your questionable policies, and hand in your resignation. The British public deserves better than this circus of incompetence and deceit.

Well, that’s all for now. But until our next article, please stay tuned, stay informed, but most of all, stay safe, and I’ll see you then.

Bénédict Tarot Freeman

Editor-at-Large

VPN City-Desk

citydesk@vpnldn.co.uk